Y’all, I have become a crier. Seriously. I have NEVER been a crier! It has been so bad – me making sure that I am “strong” – that there have been times when I have wished I COULD cry!
I read my Bible and as I am talking to the Lord, I cry. When I go to church and the songs of praise to our Lord spread across the auditorium, I cry. When someone comes forward to the altar to talk to the Lord, and other gather around to pray with them, I cry. When my kids give me a sweet card, I cry. When I am watching the hurt or pain or love of another, I cry. When I am in my car alone, with my Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir Pandora station playing, and those songs of Zion resonate in my soul, I raise my hands and cry.
What is my problem?!! Or better…is it a problem? I can’t stand manipulative, dramatic crying. It repulses me actually. But this is different.
This past year and a half has been one of the roughest I have ever lived. I have had to make decisions I never wanted to have to make. I have made a major move to another state and leaving my sweet grown daughter still living there. I had some scary health issues (double vision and fears of worsening health) that demanded more tests. I am embarking on a new journey of a million unknowns where fears can be almost overwhelming. I have grieved many losses. So, I have asked myself…are you crying so easily because you are depressed? And although, I have had tears of grief and sadness, that is not what spurs me to cry so easily. I’m not depressed. I am not sad. I am very happy and content. I have such peace and joy in my heart. I feel the presence of the Lord and see His hand over and over in my life and the lives of my children. Not always, of course, but truly almost always. So what is it? What is this abundance of tears in my life that is new to me?!
It is the never ending, always available, cherishing, protecting, engulfing, compassionate, empathetic, understanding, affirming, undeserved, and precious love of God. I am convinced that the suffering we experience in life, and as we look to Him in faith to be all to us and to fill all of our empty places, this is the promise and reward to those who follow Him…He leads us by His Spirit and He fills us with His love.
Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:
By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.
And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience;
And patience, experience; and experience, hope:
And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.
I feel that love when He speaks to me in Scripture. I experience that love when I talk to Him and feel His arms of love and support wrap around me. I witness that love when I see Him touch the hearts of others and they respond in humility and go forward and when the love of God flows through others as they gather around that searching soul. I hear that love in the praise of our Lord in song that reminds and declares and inspires to keep looking unto Jesus! I partake in that love when it comes through others whether that be a phone call, a text, a Facebook message, a visit to my home, or words of encouragement and acts of love from my kiddos.
The love of God!! It overwhelms me! Suddenly, this strong, tough girl is melted like butter and the tears just pour out of me!
If the rough circumstances of life have me crumpling underneath the bounty of God’s amazing love…then so be it.
Thank you, dear God, for your gift of true love.
The Love of God
Verse 1: The love of God is greater far
Than tongue or pen can ever tell;
It goes beyond the highest star,
And reaches to the lowest hell;
The guilty pair, bowed down with care,
God gave His Son to win;
His erring child He reconciled,
And pardoned from his sin.
Oh, love of God, how rich and pure!
How measureless and strong!
It shall forevermore endure
The saints’ and angels’ song.
Verse 2: When hoary time shall pass away,
And earthly thrones and kingdoms fall;
When men who here refuse to pray,
On rocks and hills and mountains call;
God’s love, so sure, shall still endure,
All measureless and strong;
Redeeming grace to Adam’s race
The saints’ and angels’ song. [Refrain]
Verse 3: Could we with ink the ocean fill,
And were the skies of parchment made;
Were ev’ry stalk on earth a quill,
And ev’ry man a scribe by trade;
To write the love of God above
Would drain the ocean dry;
Nor could the scroll contain the whole
Tho’ stretched from sky to sky. [Refrain]
Music speaks to my soul. David encouraged himself in the Lord and I have no doubt, that as a musician, music was one of the chief weapons against discouragement. This series will highlight songs that have comforted my soul.